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If you want to know how it all began, click HERE for the FIRST entry. At the top of each post you can click "NEXT ENTRY" and so on. It might make a bit more sense that way, and you might stumble upon one of my better postings in case this one sorta just sucks! CLICK HERE for a RANDOM ENTRY. Wednesday, Sept. 05, 2001 - 7:41 A.M. The Digital Bastard Speaks! IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIbbbeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIbbbeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIbbbeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HEY GODDAMMIT YOU FAT COW- ~sputter sputter cough~ I mean... IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIbbbeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee....coooooommmme to me Ibe. Come to the digital side.... I see you, IbePiglet. I see how you are trying to ignore me today. You think I don't notice that you put me out here in the hallway? Out of the bathroom? What do you think that accomplished, huh? I know you still think about me. Oh how you pretend to loathe me, but it isn't hatred that you feel my little Piglet. No no no...it's fear. You fear me, and yet....you are drawn to me. IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIbbbeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!! You think if you ignore me that the last 2 decades of dietary abuse will magically not count. ~chuckle~ You think if you don't look at me, last night's PizzaHut Pepperoni pizza WITH black olives somehow won't have happened? ~tsk tsk~ And you were such a good girl during the day yesterday. I rewarded you, remember? I allowed you to see a lower number. 2 days in a row I did this for you, but you had to break. Oh sure, you might blame the teacher who forcibly rammed a home made birthday cupcake down your throat. Or you might blame whomever bought that bag of Ruffles home (that would be...YOU....wouldn't it, Ibe?). Come my little IbePiglet. Come to the digital side, step upon me, see what you have done. Who knows? You have been taking that horrid little green capsule you fondly call "X" daily. You have been drinking your water. You have been eating a sensible breakfast and bringing a healthy lunch. You have been eating fresh fruit and not snacking nearly as much as you have in the past. And since you've been at work, you have certainly been more active. So take a chance, Ibe. Step on me, see what is here for you. That's it, I see you weakening. I know you want to. Perhaps I won't tack on 2 more pounds! Perhaps I may even allow you another lower number. You are so close to changing that first number from a 2 to a 1. Today might be the day. Perhaps I will allow it. IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIbbbeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIbbbeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YES! That's a girl. Come on. Nothing to fear. I won't hurt you. I won't upset you. That little binge last night won't affect your progress...I PROMISE! Yes...yes...oh good, yes push the button with your toe. Oh you silly thing, fine, take off your clothes if you must ~shudder~ I won't look. Ok, here we go....push the button...yes....step on....Go ahead Ibe, look at the number....look at it....don't be afraid.... BWWWWAAAHHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!! Here's a tissue. Go dry your eyes. And have a danish. I'll be here for you tomorrow morning.
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