And now for the television news:
When you've been sick for nearly a week, with interrupted sleep resulting in all-hour viewing, you see a LOT of shit that most normal folks will never see. Ron Popiel is now selling his sphincter, I swear to God. Just set it and forget it. I've seen the return of the Elvis movie starring Don Johnson as Elvis, the "Still Brady" interview show that's even worse, imagine that, than the original series (and I've sat through it twice now so I should know!), and the E! True Hollywood Stories I used to love have now become lame profiles of old television shows, and frankly, I didn't like Saved By The Bell when it was current.

Yes, there is good stuff out there, and I've seen all of that too. I've seen every CSI ever made in every city so many times I know all of the scripts. I know all of the Unsolved Cold Cases, can shop for intimate clothing for Will AND Grace, I can name every one of Monk's quirks. As far as cable movies go, just this week alone I've watched Under the Tuscan Sun and Finding Nemo about 6 times each...dozing in parts, or course, I'm ill. Some classics, like Family Guy, never grow old, but there are very few shows that fall into that category. I know it must be hard to come up with new ideas, or ideas so great people will sit through them again and again, or so many ideas for the same show that you can watch it every night and not get bored, like with Seinfeld and King of Queens. There are few shimmering original hopefuls out there, like Desperate Women which has a tentative nod from me, but it's only one episode old. But I hold out little hope for it, because originality in television is never rewarded. Twin Peaks is one example. And Arrested Development and 24 are testimonies to what happens to originality...it gets lost and no one knows when or where to find it.

The trend I hate is not so much the "reality" show, which is so much NOT a reality that it pisses me off that they use that term. No, it's the rehashing of the old shows from my youthful days. Even more irritating is that they aren't rehashing the good stuff. Hell no, they keep trying to resuscitate the cremated. Even worse is when they try to blend the "reality" with the resuscitation.

Tonight I saw a commercial for a new television production that just made me mad enough to swallow my phlegm and stand up and choke out a scream of protest. Ted Turner, one of the biggest arrogant assholes living today (although I use the term "living" very loosely, have you seen him lately?) has decided that we are a nation of mindless saps who will sit idly by and watch anything he puts on the air because we, as a nation, have become too lazy to lift our thumbs to the remote. I kid you not, from the tbs website:

I'd rather watch a complete season of Simple Life with the spineless richie gals in one sitting than tune into one episode of this. Please join me in your outrage. Help put an end to the filth that Ted has been spewing at us for too long now. END THE RAPING OF OUR TELEVISION PAST! We as viewers must insist that the exhumation of dismal television shows end, and we have to back it up by having enough aerobic energy to change the channel!

Come on man, help me on this one. Don't make a lot of noise, just quietly boycott the show by not tuning in. Let's email everyone in our address books the following note (or compose your own) and see if we can make a difference.

(copy and paste the following to all your email contacts. Let's make a difference)
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Friends and acquaintances:
Aren't you fed up with the likes of Ted Turner becoming so arrogantly lazy that they no longer even TRY to create new television programming? I am asking you to be silently absent from the TBS production of the "Real Gilligan's Island." Let them know that we no longer will stand for "reality" shows that are nothing even remotely real. Let them know that we didn't like Gilligan's Island when it was canceled, see, that's why it got canceled!
We are asking that you make no noise. Simply copy and paste this email to everyone on your address lists, quietly mail it out, and do not watch the program. We want to create no publicity. We just want Ted to STOP THE EXHUMATION OF TELEVISION'S GRAVEYARDS!

This message originated at http://ibepiglet.diaryland.com/turnofftbs.html.

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Thank you for your time. Let's see if we can make a dent.

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