I have invested over 5 hours of my precious time watching VH1's 100 moments that Rocked Television. It was billed as this:

Since I watched some of the episodes twice, I actually say I gave VH1 about 8 hours. And it was fun for awhile. I've spent the last several nights pretty much enjoying the shows, trying to think of what I'd count as my top 10. It's not easy, especially when you consider some of their choices. I mean, the Beatles on Ed Sullivan is like the most obvious choice. And the premier of MTV would be up there too. Beyond that, I'll be damned if I could really come up with any, although as each new event came up, I nodded and gave an "oh yeahhhhhh." Like commercial jingles for Coke and Dr. Pepper and McDonalds. They marked a generation, and they do have a place on a list of 100, but I never would have thought of them on my own.

It was actually getting fun. For sure the top 60 were all giggles and good memories. Full of forgotten or un-thought-of gems. I mean, #87 The Sonny And Cher Comedy Hour premieres. (1971). And how about #76 Dr. Pepper's commercial jingle "Wouldn't You Like To Be A Pepper Too" is on everyone lips. (1976). #56 Saturday Night Live's Lorne Michaels offers The Beatles $3,000 to reunite - and they almost do. (1976). #47 Bette Midler sings for Johnny Carson on his final Tonight Show. (1992).

As the count wound down to the final 40, some of the choices seemed obvious: #36 Desi Arnaz performs "Babalu" on I Love Lucy. (1951). #27 The Monkees premieres on NBC. (1966). #22 Elton John performs his remake of "Candle in the Wind" at Princess Diana's funeral. (1998). All of those make sense and made for some very entertaining television.

But not every choice for the top positions seemed to make sense. Perhaps they belonged in the list of 100, but the TOP 40? #25 Phoebe sings "Smelly Cat" on Friends. (1995). I know, I'm not a fan of friends, but could someone of enjoys this show honestly argue that Phoebe's stinky pussy song should rate as more important than LIVE AID being seen around the world by 1.5 BILLION viewers?!?!? I mean, come on!

I got all jittery when we finally got to the final episode, the final 20. What a trivial delight! Sonny and Cher reunite on Letterman, Schoolhouse Rock debuts, Lennon/Ono co-host the Mike Douglas Show for a week (I remember watching that), #12 Whitney Houston sings the "The Star Spangled Banner" at The Superbowl. (1991).

And then the top 10 starts to unravel, and one has to wonder WHAT THE HELL ARE THE TV GUIDE PEOPLE SMOKING AND CAN I GET SOME OF IT? #10 A one million dollar recording contract is at stake in American Idol TV talent contest. (2002). HUH? Again, I'm sure it belongs in the 100 list, but the top 10??? Most of the rest of the top 10 are within reason, including "Thriller," American Bandstand, the Osbournes, Elvis, MTV...

It was all going pretty well. And now, just to put in into perspective, and to make you go through at least a portion of what I went through and so that you can put this list into perspective... So I'll let you take a look of the entire list before I reveal the #1 Moment that ROCKED television...

100 Mariah Carey melts down and strips during an unscheduled appearance on MTV's Total Request Live. (2001)

99 Cop Rock puts a musical twist on the age-old police drama. (1990)

98 Britney Spears and others make their TV debut on Star Search. (1991)

97 GAP's swing campaign teaches viewers to "Jump, Jive & Wail" and The Brian Setzer Orchestra cashes in. (1997)

96 Public Image Limited wreak havoc on American Bandstand. (1980)

95 Buffy The Vampire Slayer airs all musical episode "Once More With Feeling." (2001)

94 Elvis made-for-TV movie features Kurt Russell as Elvis Presley. (1979)

93 Courtney Love and Madonna clash at the MTV Video Music Awards. (1995)

92 The Beatles get the send-up in the mockumentary The Rutles - All You Need Is Cash. (1978)

91 Comedic visionary Andy Kaufman sings "Mighty Mouse" on Saturday Night Live. (1975)

90 U2 performs a 9/11 tribute at Superbowl XXXVI halftime. (2002)

89 On The Brady Bunch, the kids' rise to pop stardom is sidetracked by Peter's changing voice. (1973)

88 Frank Sinatra is cut short during his Lifetime Achievement acceptance speech at the Grammy Awards. (1994)

87 The Sonny And Cher Comedy Hour premieres. (1971)

86 Kiss is unmasked on MTV. (1983)

85 James Brown keeps the peace by performing a televised concert following Martin Luther King, Jr.'s assassination. (1968)

84 Michael Jackson lends his voice to the celebrated animated series The Simpsons. (1991)

83 At the MTV Video Music Awards, Rage Against The Machine's Tim Commerford is arrested for scaling the set, and Britney Spears rips off her clothes in a scandalous performance. (2000)

82 Gloria Gaynor guests on Ally McBeal. (2000)

81 William Shatner interprets Elton John's "Rocket Man." (1977)

80 Hard rocking Aerosmith appear in a Wayne's World sketch on Saturday Night Live. (1990)

79 Vanilla Ice freaks out and destroys the studio when his video is "retired" by MTV. (1998)

78 Josie And The Pussycats, an all girl cartoon band who play their own instruments, debuts. (1970)

77 TV gets in-step with Solid Gold. (1979)

76 Dr. Pepper's commercial jingle "Wouldn't You Like To Be A Pepper Too" is on everyone lips. (1976)

75 Sesame Street's Kermit The Frog sings "It's Not Easy Being Green." (1970)

74 Devo meets Sarah Jessica Parker on Square Pegs. (1982)

73 Tiny Tim weds Miss Vicki on The Tonight Show. (1969)

72 Michael Jackson denies child molestation charges in a four minute statement broadcast live. (1993)

71 Madonna wears out the censors swearing on The Late Show with David Letterman. (1994)

70 The Dick Cavett Show's post-Woodstock broadcast features Joni Mitchell's American TV debut. (1969)

69 Aretha Franklin shows why she is Diva #1 during the live concert broadcast of VH1 Divas Live. (1998)

68 The Doobie Brothers guest star on What's Happening?. (1978)

67 Ricky Nelson launches his career with a performance on Ozzie And Harriet. (1957)

66 U2 makes their American TV debut on Tomorrow with Tom Snyder. (1981)

65 Nirvana opens the 1992 MTV Video Music Awards with a head-banging performance - literally. (1992)

64 My Name Is Barbra gives TV viewers their first extended look at the brilliant Barbra Streisand. (1965)

63 Milli Vanilli sing live on Arsenio Hall's show after being stripped of their Grammy Award. (1990)

62 Rock meets country as Bob Dylan and Johnny Cash perform on The Johnny Cash Show. (1969)

61 On Family Ties Alex & Ellen's song "At This Moment" by Billy Vera becomes a #1 hit. (1986)

60 Diana Ross performs in Central Park in a dramatic driving rainstorm. (1983)

59 Cher guest stars on Will & Grace. (2000)

58 With The Fresh Prince Of Bel-Air, Will Smith brings hip-hop to prime time. (1990)

57 Bob Dylan gets upstaged by performance crasher Soy Bomb at the Grammy Awards. (1998)

56 Saturday Night Live's Lorne Michaels offers The Beatles $3,000 to reunite - and they almost do. (1976)

55 Ed and Ralph do "The Hucklebuck" on The Honeymooners. (1956)

54 Elaine dances on Seinfeld. (1999)

53 Nirvana's "Smells Like Teen Spirit" airs on MTV. (1991)

52 Made-for-TV musical A Year Without Santa Claus premieres. (1974)

51 Hawaii Five-O's theme song is a hit. (1969)

50 Madonna defends "Justify My Love" on Nightline after the video is banned by MTV. (1990)

49 Elvis Aloha From Hawaii is beamed around the world to 1 billion viewers. (1973)

48 The Partridge Family premieres on ABC. (1970)

47 Bette Midler sings for Johnny Carson on his final Tonight Show. (1992)

46 John Lennon appears on Monday Night Football. Six years later, Howard Cosell broadcasts news of his death. (1980)

45 McDonald's "You Deserve A Break Today" is a jingle for all ages.

44 Behind The Music premieres. (1997)

43 Sammy Davis Jr. visits the Bunkers on All In The Family. (1972)

42 MTV Movie Awards host Mike Myers does a Lord of the Dance parody. (1997)

41 The Beatles' BBC performance of "All You Need Is Love" is broadcast globally. (1967)

40 South Park delivers dozens of irreverent musical moments. (1997)

39 Jennifer Lopez wears a revealing dress to Grammy Awards. (2000)

38 Miami Vice debuts on NBC. (1984)

37 The Doors rebel against CBS censors on Ed Sullivan. (1968)

36 Desi Arnaz performs "Babalu" on I Love Lucy. (1951)

35 A Charlie Brown Christmas features music by Vince Guaraldi. (1965)

34 Eric Clapton goes acoustic for MTV Unplugged. (1992)

33 Monty Python perform the "The Lumberjack Song." (1971)

32 Sin�ad O'Connor rips the Pope's picture on Saturday Night Live. (1993)

31 The Cosby Show gets musical for "Happy Anniversary" episode. (1985)

30 Davis Bowie sings "Little Drummer Boy" with Bing Crosby. (1977)

29 Steve Martin performs "King Tut" on Saturday Night Live. (1978)

28 Rock meets rap when Aerosmith & Run-D.M.C. video "Walk This Way" debuts. (1986)

27 The Monkees premieres on NBC. (1966)

26 Live-Aid is seen around the world by an estimated 1.5 billion viewers. (1985)

25 Phoebe sings "Smelly Cat" on Friends. (1995)

24 Elvis Presley is shot from the waist up on Ed Sullivan. (1956)

23 Coca-Cola hilltop commercial features "I'd Like To Teach The World To Sing." (1971)

22 Elton John performs his remake of "Candle in the Wind" at Princess Diana's funeral. (1998)

21 The Simpsons send up alternative rock festival in "Homerpalooza" episode. (1996)

20 Sonny And Cher reunite for the last time on Late Night With David Letterman. (1987)

19 Concert For New York: A Tribute To Heroes airs on VH1. (2001)

18 Schoolhouse Rock debuts on ABC's Saturday morning schedule. (1973)

17 The Who destroy their instruments on The Smothers Brothers Comedy Hour. (1967)

16 John Lennon and Yoko Ono co-host a week of The Mike Douglas Show. (1972)

15 Joe Cocker and John Belushi as Joe Cocker duet on Saturday Night Live. (1976)

14 MTV Unplugged is one of Nirvana's final TV appearances. (1994)

13 Sting and Puff Daddy eulogize Notorious B.I.G. in song at MTV Video Music Awards. (1997)

12 Whitney Houston sings the "The Star Spangled Banner" at The Superbowl. (1991)

11 Madonna gives a sexually charged performance of "Like A Virgin" at the first MTV Video Music Awards. (1984)

10 A one million dollar recording contract is at stake in American Idol TV talent contest. (2002)

9 Michael Jackson's "Thriller" video premieres. (1983)

8 Eminem and Elton John give a controversial performance of "Stan" at the Grammy Awards. (2000)

7 Pioneering rock music series American Bandstand premieres. (1957)

6 The Osbournes debuts on MTV. (2002)

5 Elvis Presley stages his famous "comeback special" on NBC. (1968)

4 MTV is launched. (1981)

3 The Beatles' give their first televised U.S. live performance on The Ed Sullivan Show. (1964)

2 Michael Jackson debuts The Moonwalk on Motown 25. (1983)

And now, faithful readers, I give you the source of my fury. The source of my frustration. Why I want my time back. This according to VH1 and America�s premiere entertainment magazine TV Guide...the NUMBER ONE moment that has rocked TV over FIVE DECADES OF TELEVSION BROADCAST HISTORY ....

#1 Bill Clinton plays sax on The Arsenio Hall Show. (1992)

What the holy hairy fuck.

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