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Saturday, Mar. 27, 2004 - 10:48 P.M.
All My Bags Are Packed
I'm ready to go...
Or maybe not. I have a very bad feeling in my stomach, something has been bothering me about this trip for several days now, and I can't quite figure out why.
I've never traveled for work before. And on the surface, going to Arizona while it's only in the 30's to 50's here is an appealing idea (even more so when the idea was pitched to me in February). I don't like the idea of being without MOTH for 4 days and nights, I can tell you that for sure. It's been a long time since Sunday became the dreaded "good-bye day," and it's left a sour taste in my mouth. But I don't think that's what's making my stomach flip.
Granted, I don't like to fly, but it's not like I really am afraid the plane will go down, or that we'll be affected by terrorists. I mean really, Chicago to Phoenix on a Sunday afternoon is rather a low profile flight. Besides, Ally will be in the same plane, so even though I'm not keen about being in the air, I don't think that's it either.
I'm going to be at the school that PitBull will run next Fall. It's her new turf. This makes her leaving more of a reality, I'll see where she's going to be every day. Like I said in my earlier post, our friendship has taken a beating this year, and I don't really know why. I know it's hard to work with friends, especially when one is above the other. But I honestly don't think I've ever taken advantage of that, in fact I think she has benefited from me working with her because I drop everything when she needs something done, and I don't make any demands of her. Requests yes. Demands no. I don't tantrum and play primadonna, I work hard. But we don't talk much anymore. She has a lot on her plate. She has always got a lot on her plate, and maybe between 4 kids and a husband and now the pressures of moving across the country and balancing the new job with the old one we don't have a chance. Between you and me, I don't think that's it.
And somehow, I have a very sad feeling about this trip. Maybe I'll feel differently when we take off, or when we land. Or when I come back and lay down next to MOTH and hug his back and make sure we have no inches between us again.
So kiss me and smile for me.....
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