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Tuesday, Apr. 29, 2003 - 7:51 P.M.

Sick and Tired


If there is one thing I HATE it's when my mother fucking piece of shit crap heap of diodes and chips that is laughingly referred to as a computer crashes, not once in a while, but every mother fucking 3 minutes. Actually, crashing might be less upsetting than its newer trick, that of spontaneously rebooting. Sometimes it will reboot itself several times in a row, before I even get a chance to aim my mouse pointer at one fucking icon. Nope, no chance. Just reboot.

Oh, and how about it suddenly asking me to log on and put in a password that just doesn't freaking exist? Or the never ending "errors" that shut down Netscape or Explorer, or whatever other program I happen to be running. And then it sends these mother fucking don't-really-exist "reports" to Microcrap. And then...reboot.

I hate this mother fucker of a pice of shit dildo feltch smegma rebooting fuckputer.

And can I find my Windows XP disks that I actually BOUGHT so I can reformat the thing? Hell no, because this piece of shit crap hole machine is housed in my piece of shit crap hole of a house. And can I reinstall Norton Anti Virus program THAT I BOUGHT so that I can perhaps find whatever the problem is and maybe eradicate it? HELL NO! Because I never put anything away and I don't feel like digging through the 5 million CD mountain to find it!

And I don't know how to troubleshoot to find the mother fucking asshole incompatible driver that is "supposedly" causing all of the problems, mainly because as far as I know I haven't installed any new mother fucking drivers so THAT little diagnostic message can bite into my huge white flabby ass cheek! And I can't cope with the so-called technicians that can't help me because they won't fucking LISTEN to me when I tell them that this wasn't always a problem, and that I did nothing new when it became a problem. One day it worked, the next day it began fucking with me.

And I CAN'T restore the computer to an earlier state that works, because it won't go back far enough. And I can't cope with this right now, I just want to fix the problem by throwing it through a window.

And while I'm at it, let me just say that I hate the way my body hurts, all the time, and I can't cope with it. And I hate the way my fingers ache, I fucked them up and I can't cope with it. And I am sick and tired and hungry and I am angry that I can't get my ass in gear and FIX THE FUCKING THINGS THAT ARE WRONG!

I can't cope with my front yard being dug up and muddy and my freak-fest of a fucking lazy shit body won't get off my fat ass to WORK ON IT! And I can't cope with the fact that my resting blood pressure is now 160/96 and that I can't get into the Doctor for 2 more days. And I am sick and tired of crying and I am sick and tired of waking up sick and tired and I am sick and tired of having to make dinner or have take-out and I am sick and tired of rap music and I am sick and tired of the government sticking their noses into the school lunch program and I am sick and tired of toilets that overflow and I am sick and tired of being sick and sick and tired.

I am sick and tired of me. And my family is sick and tired of me being out of hormone patches.


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