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Thursday, Feb. 13, 2003 - 6:17 P.M.
What's With The Gas?
You probably thought I was referring to the economy and our current spiraling gasoline prices. Yeah, well, sure that sucks too, but I have a bigger issue.
I have a serious gas issue.
Seriously.
I don't know WHAT the hell is going on but the last several days have been rectal rampage. My God a herd of trumpeting elephants would be inaudible in my company.
Of course, I have the good grace to allow such a sphynctal symphony only while alone in my office (of course, making sure to mask any odoriferous offense with a spritz of orange extract), in transit (what could possibly harm the poverty mobile?), or in front of my kids (but NOT in front of MOTH)!
It's getting very hard to try and blow my load before MOTH gets home at 6:30 and then withhold until morning. I don't know if it's the fish-oil pills I'm taking or what the hell. But seriously, I have a problem!
You know it's bad when you repulse yourself.
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